RECAP: You know what my excuse for not working out yesterday was? I was doing this blog. I am so good at BSing myself. Now today, I actually feel like crap. Mentally. Spriitually. Attitude-ly. Like I don't wanna. I was able to locate and use the television remote… Well, if I am true to my commitment (or is it my experiment?) I must push through and find some music that gets me up. Gets me started. Gets me involved in life. What first?
ON PURPOSE: SHOW ME WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR by Carolina Liar. This is one of my fave releases in the past couple years. And scrolling down my iPod...the C's came early and this is what I'm thinking right now.
"Wait, I'm wrong, should've done better than this"
We have that established, correct? I know when I'm feeling mighty low there's a thousand reasons to not. But the one that trumps it all I can't get put my finger on it. Can't just toggle the switch to off so I'll bounce up. I do like the feel of this tune.
"Save me, I'm lost, oh Lord I've been waiting for you, I'll pay any cost, save me from being confused"
Maybe the song's about another person, but right now it's about me. This song is right for the moment. Right for the movement (of me).
"Show Me What I'm Looking For"
It's a prayer. It's a beg. It's a plea.
ON PURPOSE: DARE YOU TO MOVE by Switchfoot. When I typed "movement" above, I had to get to this greatness from Switchfoot.
"I dare you to move, I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor"
Beside it segueing perfectly with that song from Carolina Liar, I need this message. A reminder that I can lay in bed and I can type my feeling all day long, but then what? Then what?
"Welcome to the fallout, welcome to resistance, the tension is here"
Keep going Jon Foreman. Keep me engaged...
"Between who you are and who you could be, between how it is and how it should be"
A swift kick in the backside is something I need once in a while. A reminder that I was built to be a productive member of society. That I can crawl off the couch and actually lace up my shoes. And go do.
"Where can you run to escape from yourself?"
For the first time today, I not only think it's time to go get a good sweat on. It's not an option to not. This song has stirred something inside of me that is craving for something to prop me up. When the negative Frank decides it's not worth it, and finally comes the positive Frank to steamroller that loser side of me. It recreates an entire chemical reaction. Something is flowing inside of me that squelches my thoughts of inadequacy.
Reminds me of my interview with Sharon Shy/The Ropes who suggested everyone have a five minute cap for wallowing (listen in here). And you should hear Jon Foreman/Swtichfoot comment on this song (listen in here).
ON PURPOSE: MAN IN THE MIRROR by Michael Jackson. I am not of fan of any mirror. Not physically. No socially.
"If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself, then make a change"
I can't tell you the last time I heard this song. Right now, I'm glad I have it. While I normally take subtle, personal lyrics and transform them to global proportions, here I am internalizing this widesweeeping message down to my personal battle today. I guess when I am comfortable looking at myself and who I am on all levels, life will be more inline with why I am here…and how I interact in the world.
SHUFFLED: THIS IS THE FUTURE by Owl City. I hardly know this song. Had to look at the screen (after it played). Thanks iPod shuffle god.
"Wake up on your own, and look around you cuz you're not alone, release your high hopes and they'll survive, cuz this is the future and you are alive"
Simple lyrics. Not really an uptempo song. More along the lines of Dare You To Move…and it's right on target.
"Dive in and swim away, from your loneliness and miserable days"
Even when I'm searching for some true motivation, I don't need the loudness. I need something that speaks volumes inside of me. If I can, on a daily basis, find music (or anything) that draws my central communications to that inner force that is screaming to be noticed, then I will succeed. I will live. I will fulfill.
SHUFFLED: TOUCH by Eager. A veracious reminder that I am not out of the woods. Nor am I alone.
"Danger ahead, i's always been said, the night is watching, waiting, for us to turn it's way instead"
I like the vibe of this tune (former PFR guys). And I am good with the idea that I can start feeling great, yet I must remain on my toes because around the corner lurks unpredictability. Patiently (eagerly?!) waiting for my guard to drop. Not today boys, not right now…thanks to
"So I rebuke the darkness, and I lift up my fear, believing they will disappear"
Nothing every completely "disappears," does it? Our brains are too complex to not hold the memory of people and events and ideas and issues. Tangled webs in our heads and hearts that we use as our defense mechanisms. They can come in handy, and they can strangle.
"Beyond the third dimension, beyond what I can see, I cannot Touch what touches me"
I love thinking about what's "out there." Be it good. Be it evil. Be it God. Be it nothing. There's a part of me that wants all the answers right now. First off though, I must strap on my helmet. Hit the pavement.
Hey music…thanks for the lift.